Just A Regular Morning
by rezzkat
Summary: In which Dirk's morning routine is interrupted, Jake tries and somewhat succeeds in being a smooth mofo and Dirk's hair gel is taken hostage. Okay, maybe it's not so normal after all. Warning: Yaoi and rated T for some language and a sloppy make out. A slightly AU DirkJake story. Cover art is by ikimaru on tumblr.


**A/N: Sorry in advance for the lack of editing. I wrote most of this in school, then I never actually typed it up until about a week ago and that's when I did my editing and adding on, so sorry if things seem choppy, out of place, etc. I'm specifically talking about the Dirk and Roxy conversation later on. It was basically just an excuse to write Roxy for a second to see if I could do it, haha! I hope you enjoy it anyways! **

**Disclaimer- I do not own Homestuck or anything like that, obviously. The only thing I own is this fic.**

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**Just A Regular Morning**

Just the same as every morning, the sun still had not risen when you awoke from your slumber. Jake always complained about you being an early riser and today you really had to agree. All you wanted to do was lay under the warm covers pressed up against your lover for a while longer… So you did. But after only 10 minutes of playing gently with his hair, you decided it was time to stop delaying the inevitable and get up.

You expertly untangled your legs from Jake's and scooted out from under his arm without causing him to stir once, a skill you had honed over the course of your relationship. Stripping off your shirt, you tossed it off to the side somewhere and made your way to the bathroom to get your "eons long" (you swear it's not _that_ long,) shower out of the way, since Jake wouldn't wake up for a while longer. You grabbed a towel and glanced back at your sleeping love, because he's just so God damn cute when he's sleeping, or anytime really.

A small smile slips its way on to your face and you allow yourself to study his face for a few more moments before entering the bathroom and shutting the door behind yourself. The shower curtain is pushed aside as you reach in to turn the water on at the highest temperature it would go. You still needed to fix the stupid water heater. "'S not like it's the only broken thing in this apartment," you mutter to yourself, pulling off the rest of your clothing and stepping under the soothing spray. Jake always wonders why you stay in the shower for so long, but you always wonder how he doesn't. It's free thinking time and, not to forget, one of the only chances you have to relax completely during the day.

Once you finished cleaning, you usually like to just stand and think. And so, you stood and thought. You thought about how your relationship was going with Jake. You thought about your work. You thought about all of your robotics projects. You thought about Jake. You thought about what you needed to do today. You thought about what you needed to get at the store tomorrow. You thought about Jake.

Just then, you heard your phone buzzing from the sink counter and wondered why you'd brought the damn thing in here with you in the first place. It was most likely nothing, but what if it wasn't? You didn't want to get out, but what if someone really needed you? Sometimes Jake accused you of worrying too much and you'd have to agree with him this time as you hurriedly stepped out of the shower and made a grab for your cell.

**TipsyGnostalgic (TG) began bothering TimeausTestified (TT) at 7:16**

**TG:** heeeey diiirrrrk

**TG:** diiirrrrrrrkkkkkkk

**TG:** Plz dont tel me your in th shower

**TG:** *shower

**TG:** *nvm that was right

**TT:** Yes. I was, but now, obviously, I'm not.

**TT:** What do you need?

**TG:** i don't ned anythin

**TG:** cant a girl just say hello to her bbff?

**TG:** (best boy friend forever)

**TT:** Right. I think I'm just going to get back in the shower then, we can say hello later.

**TG:** waaaiiiiiiiiiiit!

**TG:** your so cold dirky dirk!

**TT:** …

**TG:** well okay

**TG:** so

**TG:** maybe i did want to talk to you about something

**TT:** And that would be…?

**TG:** SIIIHGGGH

**TG:** i want to ask janey out but i don't know hoiw

**TG:** *how

**TT:** That's cool, but what exactly did you want me to do about that?

**TG:** i don't knooowww

**TG:** maybe por sojme of your "asking out my best frend" dust on me

**TG:** *ppor

**TG:** *poor

**TG:** wait no, i mean *pour

**TG:** what if she stil hasnt got over the whole jake thing?

**TG:** what if she hates me :(

**TT:** I highly doubt that she'd hate you for expressing your feelings

**TT:** And if she still hasn't gotten over "the whole jake thing" then she's hardly worth your time in the romantic department.

**TG:** le sign

**TG:** i know

**TG:** but i rlly like her

**TG:** like

**TG:** like-like her

**TG:** completly non-pletonic and lesbin love her

**TT:** Then just tell her

**TT:** That's what I did for Jake

**TG:** but im not yoi and shes not jake

**TG:** what if I fuck everything up?

**TT:** Trust me; I honestly believe it'll work out just fine

**TT:** I believe in you. You can do it

**TG:** aw thanks dirl

**TG:** *dirk

**TG:** well….. i gues i can just try

**TG:** if you coud do it with your boy crush then i cn do it wih my girl crusgh

**TT:** That's the spirit

**TT:** Go get her, Rox

**TG:** thanks

**TipsyGnogstalgic (TG) ceased bothering TimeausTestified (TT)**

Well, now that you've talked to Roxy for a while, you don't see the point in getting back in the shower, so you throw on a pair of boxers and pants and cast a glance at Jake. Yes, he's still sleeping. You walk down to the kitchen and begin making yourself some coffee and a cup of tea for Jake. While waiting for your coffee, you went back to the bedroom for your shades since the light shining in through the windows was steadily getting brighter.

The coffee maker beeped at you to get a move on as you were pulling a shirt over your head. So back to the kitchen you went to grab a cup and pour yourself a caffeinated beverage, not that you really needed it, but it was nice to get an extra nudge in the morning. You scrolled through important news bulletins on your phone as you sipped at your coffee but, after finding nothing interesting, put away the device and sat in a comfortable silence.

When you were done, you set the cup in the sink to be washed later and Jake's tea in the microwave to be heated up once he was up. Right. Now you needed to brush your teeth and do something with your hair, if Jake wasn't up by then, you'd go work on some robotics projects until he was. Retrieving your toothbrush, you grabbed Jake's toothpaste and put a generous amount of it on the bristles. What? You ran out of your own toothpaste last week and hadn't gotten around to getting any more.

You scrubbed at your teeth for a full minute, then spit out the foam and set the toothbrush to the side while you retrieved your hair gel from the cabinet. Another minute was spent on finger-combing the gel throughout your pale blond hair until you were somewhat satisfied with it's appearance. You rinsed the excess gel from your hands and picked back up the toothbrush to work on your teeth a bit more. Ever since getting braces, you had become a bit religious with the whole "rinse and repeat" routine. The orthodontist you went to was kind of scary, not that you'd tell anyone that you thought so.

As you reached for the mouthwash, you held the toothbrush in your mouth so you could have both of your hands available to open the stupid child lock. Before you could even grab the bottle, however, you were interrupted by two hands grabbing your face and turning you around. Lips were pressed against yours and you made a muffled noise of protest, reaching up in attempts to push Jake off of you. The toothbrush handle could be felt poking out between both, you and Jake's, cheeks and the head of it caught between your braces and Jake's adorable buck teeth.

"_Really, English?"_ you thought exasperatedly. As much as you liked kissing Jake, or having Jake kiss you, for that matter, you could feel the toothpastey spit beginning to leak out of the corner of your mouth and it kind of made you want to gag. How the hell could Jake put up with it? Finally, you shoved him off of you, because you really needed to breathe but when you took in a gasp of much needed air, your toothbrush fell out of your mouth and hit the floor along with a glob of the toothpaste/saliva mixture in your mouth. You made a face at the mess on the floor, then looked up to glare at Jake who was grinning at you as if he'd just won a goddamn prize.

"Dude. What the actual fuck?" you wiped your mouth off with the back of your hand.

"Just saying, 'top of the morning' to you, chap!" he smiled a bit wider, ignoring the splotch of toothpaste on his lips. You just rolled your eyes behind your shades and turned around to spit into the sink, before grabbing the toothbrush off the floor and tossing it into the wastebasket, it was getting old anyways.

"Do you think maybe next time you could wait for a more convenient time? Maybe a word of warning?"

"Where's the adventure in that?" You sighed and reached up to wipe the toothpaste off his face with your thumb. In return he reached to grab the shades from your face, prompting you to swat his hand away. "Oh come now, Strider!"

"Nope. You lost your privilege to the 'Strider Look' when you interrupted my morning ritual."

"Don't be a child," Jake scolded you and reached for your shades once again, causing you to lean away from his hands. "Stop pouting," he practically whined still grabbing at your face.

"No!" you whined back, just as childishly, stepping backwards again, until your back was pressed against the bathroom counter. It didn't stop you, though, as you began bending backwards over the sink but when you couldn't possibly bend any further without snapping, you tried to duck to the side. You didn't get very far, as Jake had stepped up and pinned you between his hips and the counter.

"Ha!" he cheered as he finally got ahold of your shades and pulled them from your face, making you blink rapidly and squint in the bathroom's harsher lighting. Jake beamed at you, with just a hint of smugness as he put the shades to the side and pulled you into another kiss, threading his fingers through your hair.

Grumbling into the kiss, you pushed at him half-heartedly as you tried to tell him that you "just made [your] hair presentable, dammit!" but eventually you gave in a wrapped your arms around his neck, loosely interlocking your fingers behind his head. You could feel him smile when you finally relaxed and you sighed contentedly into the kiss.

You felt him run his tongue against your bottom of your lips and you parted them in response. His tongue swiped over a section of the metal in your mouth just like he always did. Whenever you ask him why he does that, he just grins cheekily and kisses you, so you let it go. Usually, you'd battle for control, or at least playfully put up a fight, but this time you were fine with just letting him take charge.

When he pulls back to breathe, you make him tilt his head forward so that you can rest your forehead on his (you're still annoyed that he hit a late growth spurt and got taller than you.) He stares into "those orange beauties of yours," (his words, not yours,) and you push forward to tap your nose against his and he retaliates by pressing a light kiss on the base of your nose right between your eyes. You resist the urge to giggle embarrassingly like a kawaii school girl and, instead, settle for finally giving him a small smile.

"I must say, Strider," he grins cheekily, "You taste an awful lot like toothpaste this fine morning."

You stare at him for a moment and deadpan, "Hmm, I sincerely wonder why that is." Then you poke his lips with the tip of your tongue and he begins to chuckle, which causes you to chuckle as well and it isn't long before you've both collapsed into laughing fits, leaning against each other to keep both of your balances as you both laugh loudly together.

The last of your laughter comes as a soft snicker into your hand and once you'd both calmed down, Jake pressed a firm kiss to your forehead. "You should laugh more often, you know?"

"Yeah, yeah whatever, now get out while I attempt to fix my hair. Again," you give him a pointed look and then awkwardly shove him towards the door.

"I think it looks just fine!" he protests as you give him another shove.

"No, it doesn't. Just because the scruffy look works for you, doesn't mean it works for me," you told him, finally getting him past the threshold, then turning and picking the gel up off of the counter.

"I said: It looks just fine as it is." He said a little more firmly, dodging around you and plucking the hair gel right out of your hands with a: "Yoink!"

You swear your eyebrow twitched as he ran laughing from the bathroom with your hair gel in tow. After a moment's hesitation, you walked swiftly down the hall, but were stopped short as you stared at the front door to your apartment swinging on it's hinges. You ran to the door and looked out just in time to see Jake disappearing down the stair well, your hair gel still held hostage.

You looked both ways and bit your lip before giving a groan and running down the hallway, your bare feet pounding on the rug as you flung the stairwell door open and dodged past a pair of women who were staring confusedly over the railing at your boyfriend, who only spared a glance up to see you in pursuit before laughing again and dashing out of the stairwell. The two women finally looked at you and began laughing as they seemed to put two and two together as you raced as quickly as you dared down the stairs.

_He better not have left the building, we are both lacking shoes, _you thought , when you finally skidded to a stop in the lobby and began looking around wildly, you noticed someone waiting for the elevator who, upon catching sight of you, began chuckling behind one of their hands and using the other to point at the front entrance. You barely muffled a scream of frustration and darted for the doors and quickly spotted a messy mop of black hair bobbing through the crowds. He looked back and you knew he caught sight of you when he gave a cheery wave and resumed running. You dashed down the sidewalk, bobbing and weaving through the crowd after your jerk of a boyfriend, yelling after him.

"English! Get back here!"

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**A/N: If you can't tell; the ending was one of the things I added on, haha! Sorry if it seems rushed, or weird. Thanks for reading though! I hope you enjoyed it! Reviews would be very much appreciated, I want to know if I wrote any of the characters correctly, it's one of the things I worry about the most when I write :) **


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